10 Commandments of Marriage According to the Happiest Couples Alive

Marriage is a journey, not a destination. While every relationship is unique, there are some fundamental principles that can help guide couples toward a happy, fulfilling partnership. These 10 commandments of marriage are not about rigid rules but rather timeless pieces of wisdom that can help strengthen your bond, weather challenges, and build a foundation of love and respect.

Whether you’re newlywed or celebrating decades together, these principles can offer guidance in maintaining a healthy and thriving relationship. Let’s dive in.

Table of Contents

1. Thou Shalt Communicate Openly and Honestly

Effective communication is the cornerstone of any strong relationship. Open and honest communication helps couples understand each other’s needs, resolve conflicts, and express love. In marriage, it’s crucial to be able to talk about anything—your feelings, your dreams, your frustrations—without fear of judgment.

The commandment here is simple: don’t bottle up your emotions. Be transparent, even when it’s difficult. This doesn’t mean you should communicate everything all at once, but it’s important to express yourself regularly and ensure that your partner knows where you stand.

When you’re open, the relationship becomes a safe space for both partners to share and grow.

2. Thou Shalt Always Show Respect

Respect is a fundamental pillar in marriage. Without mutual respect, a relationship can quickly become toxic. Show respect by valuing your partner’s opinions, boundaries, and differences. Treat them with kindness, even when you disagree.

In marriage, respect also means honoring each other’s individuality. Your spouse is not an extension of you—they are their own person with their own thoughts, feelings, and desires. A respectful marriage is one where both individuals can thrive independently and together.

Remember, respect in action speaks louder than words. Whether it’s through a simple gesture of kindness, a listening ear, or acknowledging your spouse’s worth, respect should be at the heart of your relationship.

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3. Thou Shalt Prioritize Each Other

Life can get busy with work, kids, and everything else in between. But no matter what’s going on, your spouse should always be a priority. Marriage requires time, effort, and dedication. If you put your relationship on the back burner too often, it can begin to wither.

Make an effort to spend quality time together, even when life gets hectic. It doesn’t have to be grand—small gestures like a dinner date, a phone call, or an evening walk can go a long way in reconnecting.

A marriage isn’t something that will thrive by accident. Make your spouse feel loved and valued daily.

4. Thou Shalt Forgive and Let Go of Grudges

Holding onto anger, resentment, or past mistakes can create distance and tension in marriage. Forgiveness is vital in moving forward and creating a healthy emotional environment for both partners. It’s natural to get hurt or frustrated sometimes, but it’s important to forgive and let go so that you don’t carry the weight of past issues into the future.

Remember, forgiveness doesn’t mean forgetting or excusing bad behavior—it means choosing to release negative emotions for the sake of your relationship. It’s an act of love that frees both you and your partner from the burden of unresolved conflict.

5. Thou Shalt Support Each Other’s Dreams and Goals

Marriage isn’t just about the present—it’s also about supporting one another’s future. Encourage and uplift your partner’s dreams and goals. Whether it’s career aspirations, personal growth, or creative endeavors, being your spouse’s biggest cheerleader will deepen your bond.

Support doesn’t always mean agreeing on everything. It means showing that you respect their vision and are willing to stand by them as they pursue what makes them happy. By supporting each other’s ambitions, you create a partnership where both individuals feel empowered to grow and succeed together.

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6. Thou Shalt Keep the Intimacy Alive

Intimacy is about more than just physical connection—it’s about emotional and physical closeness that fosters a sense of love and security. Over time, life’s distractions can often lead to a lack of intimacy in marriage, but it’s crucial to make intimacy a priority.

Whether it’s regular affection, meaningful conversations, or sexual intimacy, keeping the connection alive helps strengthen the relationship. Make time for each other in intimate ways—both emotionally and physically. It will remind you both of the love that brought you together.

7. Thou Shalt Be Patient and Understanding

Marriage requires a great deal of patience and understanding. Both of you will face challenges, personal growth, and changes over time. It’s important to be patient with each other’s flaws, mistakes, and imperfections.

Sometimes, we want our partners to change or behave in a certain way, but accepting them as they are—with their quirks, habits, and imperfections—is what creates long-lasting love. Being patient helps you navigate the ups and downs without letting small issues become insurmountable obstacles.

8. Thou Shalt Maintain Healthy Boundaries

Healthy boundaries are essential in marriage, even though it might seem counterintuitive. Having boundaries doesn’t mean you’re emotionally distant; it means respecting each other’s personal space, feelings, and individuality.

Each partner should feel they can pursue their own interests, take time for themselves, and set limits on behaviors that make them uncomfortable. Clear boundaries allow for trust, respect, and personal growth within the marriage, helping both partners to feel seen and valued.

9. Thou Shalt Handle Conflict with Care

Conflict is inevitable in any marriage, but it’s how you handle it that matters. Fighting fair is crucial to maintaining a healthy relationship. Avoid blame, insults, or bringing up past issues—focus on the present and work together to find a resolution.

In times of conflict, remember to stay calm and listen actively. The goal of any disagreement should be mutual understanding and compromise, not “winning” the argument. Respect your partner’s perspective and work together toward a solution that benefits both of you.

10. Thou Shalt Keep Laughing Together

Laughter is not just fun—it’s an important psychological tool in marriage. Couples who can laugh together, share inside jokes, and find humor in life’s challenges tend to have stronger relationships. Laughter builds emotional connection and helps reduce stress, making it easier to navigate tough times.

Never underestimate the power of shared humor. It can bring you closer and remind you both to not take life too seriously. So, whether it’s watching a comedy show, reminiscing about funny moments, or simply being silly together, keep the laughter alive.

Final Thoughts: Love, Respect, and Commitment

Marriage isn’t always easy, but with the right mindset and approach, it can be one of the most rewarding relationships of your life. The 10 commandments of marriage aren’t about rigid rules—they’re about creating a foundation of love, respect, and communication that will support your relationship for years to come.

Remember, a strong marriage is built on mutual effort, patience, and care. The commitment to continuously grow together, love unconditionally, and support one another is what makes a marriage truly special.

FAQs: Commandments of Marriage

How do I keep the romance alive in my marriage?

Focus on quality time together, small acts of affection, and meaningful conversations. Regularly show appreciation and create opportunities for intimacy and connection.

How can we improve communication in our marriage?

Practice active listening, avoid interrupting, and express your feelings clearly. Make time to check in with each other regularly, ensuring both partners feel heard.

What if we don’t agree on everything?

It’s normal to have differences in a marriage. The key is to respect each other’s opinions and find common ground through compromise and understanding.

How do I handle conflict in a healthy way?

Focus on resolving the issue without attacking each other. Stay calm, listen actively, and approach the conflict with a problem-solving mindset rather than a “win-lose” mentality.

How can I balance my marriage with other responsibilities?

Prioritize your relationship by setting aside dedicated time for your spouse, even in busy seasons. Small gestures of love go a long way, even when life is hectic.